Wednesday, June 11, 2014

For You Father

Yes, I blog. Why? because I write. Why do I write? because I love to. It's one thing I have been sure of in my life, my life changed, my goals changed, my situations changed, my likings and dislikings changed but one thing that remained constant is my zeal to write; penning every thought down.

I was an awkwardly introvert child who had her own world of fantasies. I was always eerily mature for my age. I understood situations and never threw tantrums just to make my will be done. I was considerate, empathetic at an age when other kids threw tantrums, rolled over and did what not in a fit of so called rage. So, I was abnormal.
I knew more things than my class mates,had a good knowledge, I didn't study much in fact I don't remember consciously how did I learnt about The Nine Planets, The Stars and English Grammar. I never studied English Grammar before exams. And I was not Nerdy I was well dressed and was my teacher's pet and my friends' heart beat.

Now before taking me as a genius please hold on in fact my brother was of a similar  kind barring the writing part, (he is more into machines). It was nothing but my Parents. My Mother is an excellent teacher,she teaches you, makes you know things and all the while you think you are playing. She is a great story teller and my greatest strength.My Father, well what to say about him, he is the reason I grew empathetic and disciplined and never had thrown any tantrums. He treated us as "young adults" and never as kids. He made us accountable and answerable for our own actions.I was grilled for hours for a so called "innocent mischief"  like speaking in between, taking things from the plate in a hurry, sneezing without putting my handkerchief in front of my mouth  etc since I was three years old or a bit less. Yes, it sounds cruel but then it made a a fine specimen of a human being when I faced the world. My parents were my greatest critic,they knew one thing that I was their life but so, is every child and the world doesn't actually count how much your parents love you.
My Dad watched television with us, played with us after he returned fro the office, taught us and we never had any tutors till higher classes. He did all this with such an ease and when I am working I know how hard it is to do this. He cracked jokes with us, told us about his youth and college days and every single day atleast for once he mentioned his Dad, who had died even before my Dad got married.

He didn't raise me as his son. No, he raised both of us , me and my brother as humans. He was the one who dreamt of me becoming an engineer but actually was beaming with joy when I cracked through the merit list of B.A. (English Honours). He guided us and never made us choose his choice or live his dreams.

He was the one who instilled in me the idea of expressing through pen. People call me "Miss Encyclopedia" "Miss English" but this is all due to person who woke up at 3 am in the morning to teach me, then spent 12 hours in the Factory as an Engineer at work, came back played with me for an hour, taught me till 12 am and then went to sleep and this was his life during my examination time. I slept in the afternoon but he didn't. I wonder how!!

Today seven years have passed I have not heard his voice, I have not seen him. Seven years he has not responded to when I call "Babai". Seven years...a lot of things have happened, I don't know if he knows it or not but all I wanted to say to him the last time he called was "I know you will be there for me, don't have to say me that." and I still believe that and I wish my last day at work should be my last day in life.... just like you.

Dedicated to My Father Mr. Dipankar Ghosh
also my Guardian Angel from 11th June 2007.

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